Results that Move You!

I just blew it with a friendship - I stepped on her toes, I took an unfair turn without her knowledge, I broke the trust code, I screwed up.  How's that for a relationship? - she would have cause to block me from her life, but unfortunately, I work in the same office and would have occasion to see her, speak with her, and to live my disgrace all over again.  Sure the fault is mine, and I freely admitted it.  She called me down on it.  She had a right to do that.  It was my own stupidity not thinking through any residual consequences before I hit "send" on the email that I should not have sent. I did apologize, but that may not be enough.

There is another person who was influential in my life, just a few years ago.  She helped me in many ways, we were even looking at business that we could run together - but in a couple ways I didn't want to go in a certain direction.  Then the big thing happened - she told me her life story over coffee and it really tore out my heart and I couldn't deal with it.  So, instead of being bold, which is my nature most of the time, I did the un-courageous thing and cut her off.  I only did this because I couldn't deal with it - and now that I look back, I'm seeing that it was also a way to make a clean break from something that I didn't want to do.

Sometimes I feel that I need to crawl into a hole, but that would lead me to my own thoughts. That couldn't be good.